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Category: Family

Bumpy and Smooth. The anatomy of a stutter. ?>

Bumpy and Smooth. The anatomy of a stutter.

This post was brought to you in partnership with Box Hill Speech Pathology Clinic* Milla was around three and a half when we first started to notice her stutter. We had already been seeing a speech pathologist for just over a year due to Milla’s autism diagnosis, so it was picked up on fairly early. Disfluency in young children can be quite common. Many move through this phase with little to no intervention, the stutter resolving itself with time. Box Hill…

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Tumbleweeds ?>


It has been oh so quiet here lately. My last blog post was on the 1st of November, LAST YEAR! There was no wrap-up of 2016, no introduction to 2017. Just… tumbleweeds. Even my Facebook page has been fairly quiet, bar the odd viral meme. I don’t really have a definitive answer as to why. It’s not like I don’t have anything to say, I lay awake at night begging my brain to just STFU so I can sleep. It…

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Breaking The Cycle. ?>

Breaking The Cycle.

I talk a lot about how I am ‘breaking the cycle.’ Like it’s easy. Like this was my plan the whole time. I come from a long line of dysfunction. Mental illness runs rife throughout my family history. I didn’t think I would make it here. Functioning. Raising a daughter, being a wife. Alive. I very nearly didn’t.  I don’t really know how I made it out, where I got the strength to just keep trying even when every fibre…

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One. Not Only. ?>

One. Not Only.

Dear Milla, I’m sorry. I know how desperately you want to be a big sister. How much you want to have a little brother or sister of your own. I understand, I spent eighteen years as an ‘only’ child wishing I had a brother or sister to share my childhood with. I swore I would never have an ‘only’ child, I always dreamed of having a big family. Your Daddy grew up with three brothers, I think he also hoped for…

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Broken. ?>


When I was born, I had so many beautiful things. They were precious, special, just for me. But someone kept breaking them. I thought she would help me look after them, but instead she dropped them, smashed them, kicked them away. The more I asked her to stop, the more she seemed to relish taking them away from me. Even though I tried to understand that she was sad, as people had broken all that was special and precious to her; it was so hard to live…

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The One Where Everything Changed. ?>

The One Where Everything Changed.

  Yesterday I read this post that Kerri Sackville shared on her Facebook page, talking about  signs that you grew up with a toxic parent. Reading through the comments, it became clear that some people really had a very limited understanding of exactly how ‘toxic’ a parent can be. Comments along the lines of ‘everybody has issues with their parents’ and ‘be grateful you have parents’ cut me a little deep I must admit. Not everyone is lucky enough to be…

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2015. ?>


At midnight, as the new millennium clicked over, the year 2000, I stood in the CBD of Melbourne. I swayed a little, drunk, as I strained to see the fireworks over the heads of the crowd that swarmed around me. I was with my boyfriend, who would one day become my husband, then soon after, my ex-husband. He was angry at me for the aforementioned drunken-ness. My new years resolution was quitting smoking; the first of many attempts. My work colleagues cat…

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I Am Not Who They Think I Am. ?>

I Am Not Who They Think I Am.

This post was originally published as “When a stew is not just a stew” on, 11th of July, 2011. My lovely partner is now my husband, despite my dubious culinary skills. Also I have since mastered a delicious chickpea and potato curry in the slow cooker. No one likes bloody stew anyway.  Tonight, I cried over a failed stew. Now, to those not in my head, that seems kind of ridiculous. (and to be honest, in my head, it still…

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My Choice. ?>

My Choice.

{Originally published 01/08/11 on} My greatest fear has always been that I will end up like my mother. And I’ll be honest, I have come close to walking down that path. I have made some very bad choices. I have done things I’m not proud of. I have succumbed to my weakness’s, and blamed my ‘bad childhood’ for the messes I have made. Of course, my low self esteem and poor role models have contributed. Eventually though, there comes…

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What I would say. ?>

What I would say.

Dear teenage self, Right now, you are in such a hurry to grow up. You think that life will be so much easier when you are an adult and can make your own choices and decisions. Turns out making the right choices and decisions is a lot harder than you can imagine. You do eventually get it right, but not until after you make a whole lot of bad ones. I want you to stop and try and work out…

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